Articles

Still Life 365
A beautiful blog dedicated to grieving mothers, fathers and family members.

The Fertile Source
Poignant essay by Cara Holman about her miscarriage experience that occurred between her first and second child.

Grief and Loss Observed by a Birth Doula
In 2003 Certified Birth Doula, Kimberly Packard-Beck wrote this article on Loss and Grieving from the viewpoint of a practicing birth doula. It was written as an educational resource for other doulas to learn more about losses that may occur with birth and how to support to a client if she experienced a birth loss.

Literature for Hospice/End of life Care/Palliative Care

Dying Well by Ira Byock

Nobody should have to die in pain. Nobody should have to die alone. This is Ira Byock’s dream, and he is dedicating his life to making it come true. Dying Well brings us to the homes and bedsides of families with whom Dr. Byock has worked, telling stories of love and reconciliation in the face of tragedy, pain, and conflict. It is a companion for families, showing them how to deal with doctors, talk to loved ones—and make the end of life as meaningful and enriching as the beginning.

Being with Dying: Cultivating Compassion and Fearlessness in the Presence of Death by Joan Halifax

The Buddhist approach to death can be of great benefit to people of all backgrounds—as has been demonstrated time and again in Joan Halifax’s decades of work with the dying and their caregivers. Inspired by traditional Buddhist teachings, her work is a source of wisdom for all those who are charged with a dying person’s care, facing their own death, or wishing to explore and contemplate the transformative power of the dying process. Her teachings affirm that we can open and contact our inner strength, and that we can help others who are suffering to do the same.

The Four Things That Matter Most by Ira Byock

Four simple phrases — “Please forgive me,” “I forgive you,” “Thank you,” and “I love you” — carry enormous power. In many ways, they contain the most powerful words in our language. These four phrases provide us with a clear path to emotional wellness; they guide us through the thickets of interpersonal difficulties to a conscious way of living that is full of integrity and grace.
In The Four Things That Matter Most, Dr. Ira Byock, an international leader in palliative care, teaches us how to practice these life-affirming words in our day-to-day lives.

Final Gifts: Understanding The Special Awareness, Needs and Communications of the Dying by Maggie Callahan and Patricia Kelley.
In this moving and compassionate book, hospice nurses Maggie Callanan and Patricia Kelley share their intimate experiences with patients at the end of life, drawn from more than twenty years experience tending the terminally ill.

Literature for Perinatal Loss

Empty Cradle, Broken Heart, Revised Edition: Surviving the Death of Your Baby by Deborah L. Davis
Empty Cradle, Broken Heart offers reassurance to parents who struggle with anger, guilt, and despair after such tragedy. Deborah Davis encourages grieving and makes suggestions for coping.

Pregnancy After a Loss: A Guide to Pregnancy After a Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Infant Death Carol Cirulli Lanham
“A ‘must-have’ guide for the devastated couple dealing with the many questions and fears that occur with a subsequent pregnancy.” –Candace Hurley, Executive Director/Founder, Sidelines National Support Network

Miscarriage: Women Sharing from the Heart Allen, Marie, Ph.D., & Marks, Shelly, M.S.
Handbook by two bereaved mothers focuses on helping mothers to acknowledge and grieve the death of their unborn child. The authors share their intimate feelings and those of the 100 diverse women whom they interviewed about maternal love, loneliness, confusion, responses of their partners and doctors, and obstacles to grieving.

A Silent Sorrow: Pregnancy Loss – Guidance and Support for You and Your Family by
Ingrid Kohn and Perry-Lynn Moffitt
A Silent Sorrow has long been considered the “bible” for families seeking emotional and practical support after a pregnancy loss.

I Never Held You: Miscarriage, Grief, Healing and Recovery (Volume 1) [Paperback]
Ellen M. DuBois
I Never Held You speaks to the heart of women, their families and friends who have either lived through the pain & grief after miscarriage, or who want to better support someone who has.

A Guide For Fathers: When A Baby Dies by Tim Nelson
Small, simple, and meaningful- for dads who are not only dealing with the feelings of their wives, but also suffer their own, unique grief.

Swallowed by a Snake: The Gift of the Masculine Side of Healing (Thomas R. Golden, LCSW)
A book honoring the uniqueness of a man’s path towards healing. I find this material interesting and stimulating and feel it will fill a void in the literature about grief and gender differences. The material presents a fresh look into the uniqueness of a man’s grief in a way that both men and women will find extremely helpful. — Elisabeth Kubler-Ross M.D.

The Good Grief Club: A True Story about the Power of Friendship and French Toast.
Written by a bereaved mother, The Good Grief Club is the true story of seven women who discover that their new friendships have the power to heal the pain of losing their babies in miscarriage, stillbirth, and infant death.

Bereavement Resources and Perinatal Loss Support Groups

SHARE National Office
Mutual support for bereaved parents and families who have suffered a loss due to miscarriage, stillbirth, or neonatal death. Provides newsletter, pen pals, and referrals.
(800) 821-6819
http://www.nationalshare.org

Center for Loss in Multiple Birth, Inc. (CLIMB)
Support for parents who have experienced the death of one or more of their twins or higher multiples. Newsletter, information on specialized topics, pen pals, phone support.
http://www.CLIMB-support.org

SIDS
National SIDS resource Center
Supports research, educates the public, and provides support network
http://www.sidscenter.org

SIDELINES
A non-profit organization providing international support for women and their families experiencing complicated pregnancies and premature births.
http://www.sidelines.org

RESOLVE
The National Infertility Association, is a non-profit organization with the only established, nationwide network mandated to promote reproductive health and to ensure equal access to all family building options for men and women experiencing infertility or other reproductive disorders.
http://www.resolve.org

Grief Support

Hello Grief provides information and resources about grief in order to break through the current culture of avoidance that surrounds death and loss. Instead, Hello Grief addresses bereavement head-on for those who are helping others cope, as well as those who need support on their own personal journey with grief.

Comfort Zone Camp, a community where kids can come year after year to get tools to help them cope with daily life after loss.

Mourning Star The Mourning Star Centers are dedicated to providing gentle and loving support to children and teens that are experiencing grief, often times resulting from the death of a parent or sibling. The Centers provide a supportive and safe environment which encourages the sharing of feelings to facilitate the process of healing.

 “A way you can honor your pet’s passing is going forward to live your best life possible.”

Pet Loss

Arizona

Companion Animal Association of Arizona
Scottsdale
Telephone: (602) 995-5885
Website: www.griefhealing.com

California

Claire Gillenson, M.A.
Venice, CA
Business phone: (310) 314-9837

University of California School of Veterinary Medicine
One Shields Avenue
Davis 95616-8747
Business phone: (530) 752-3602
HOTLINE PHONE: 1 (800) 565-1526

The Grief Recovery Institute Beverly Hills
Telephone: (888) 773-2683 or (800) 334-7606
Website: www.grief.net

Julie D. Richard, RN, MPH
Grief and Loss Educator
PO Box 62
Carmel, CA 93921

Human-Animal Program and School of Veterinary Medicine
University of California
Davis, Ca. 95616

Pet Loss Support Hotline
Phone 530-752-4200
Toll Free 1-800-565-1526
Monday to Friday 6:30 to 9:30 P.M. P.S.T.

Sharon Callahan
P.O. Box 1056,
Mount Shasta, Ca. 96067
Free Grief Counseling

Pet Psyc
Terri M. Austin, Ph.D.
Monterey, Ca. 93942
Pet Loss Counseling

Support for Animal Loss
Human Society of Santa Clara Valley
2530 Lafayette Street
Santa Clara, Ca 95050
Phone 408-727-7845

Pet Loss Support Group
Meets 2nd and 4th Wednesday of the Month
Santa Cruz SPCA
2200 7th Ave
Santa Cruz 95062
Phone 408-475-6454 or 408-688-4968

Julie Austin, Psy.D.
2425 Colorado Avenue, Suite 208
Santa Monica CA 90404
(310) 535-1360
A licensed psychologist in Los Angeles, who works with families, individuals.

Pet Loss Support Group
Berkeley-East Bay Humane Society
7-9 p.m. the third Tuesday of each month at
www.berkeleyhumane.org/Community/Pet_Loss.htm
For Pet Loss Support Group information call Roy Gesley, (510) 752-7757
or Jill Goodfriend, (510) 393-1359

Pet Loss Support Group
Betty Carmack, R.N.
Meets the first Monday of each month
For Details and Location call the San Francisco Spca at 415-554-3000

Pet Loss Support Group
Redwood Empire Veterinary Medical Association
Meets the 1st and 3rd Tuesday of the month
Contact Cheri Ross at 707-527-9330 for details

Pet Loss Support Group
Oakland Humane Society
8323 Baldwin
Oakland, Ca 94621
Phone Carol Nobori at 415-569-0702 for details

Animal Health Foundation Pet Loss Support Group
St.Augustine by the Sea
1227 4th St
Santa Monica, CA 90401
Meets the 1st and 3rd Monday of the month 7:00 P.M. to 9:00 P.M.
Phone 213-559-3164

Pet Loss Support Hotline
Delta Society
Palm Springs Network
146 Pali
Palm Springs, Ca 92264
Phone 619-320-3298 for details

Colorado

Colorado State University School of Veterinary Medicine
Fort Collins
Telephone: (970) 491-1242

Florida

University of Florida School of Veterinary Medicine, Gainsville
Telephone: (352) 392-4700, Extension

Idaho
Sandra Brackenridge, MSW, BCD,LSW-P
E-mail: bracsand@isu.edu
Former counselor for Louisiana State University School of Veterinary Medicine, Current consultant for Idaho Veterinary Medical Association and their clients, and Professor of Social Work at Idaho State University.
Telephone: (209) 282-2546
No charge except the phone call.

Illinois

Chicago Veterinary Medical Association Chicago
Telephone: (630) 325-1600C.A.R.E. Pet Loss Helpline, University of Illinois
Urbana
Telephone: (217) 244-2273 or (877) 394-2273 (toll free)
snet.cvm.uiuc.edu/CARE/Chicago Illinois VMA
708-603-3994 anytime
Calls will be returned 7:00 P.M. to 9:00 P.M.
Long Distance Calls will be returned “Collect”

Iowa

Pet Loss Support Hotline at Iowa State University
2116 College of Veterinary Medicine
Ames 50011
Telephone: 1 (888) 478-7574
Website: www.vetmed.iastate.edu/animals/petloss

Kentucky

Bluegrass Pet Crematorium
868 Floyd Drive #102
Lexington, Kentucky 40505
Office (606) 367-1282
Pager (606) 330-8226
Fax (606) 367-1330
Email: Don.Simmons@Lgeenergy.com
Owner: Paul DeBoor
Member: International Association of Pet Cemeteries (IAPC)Pet Loss Support Group

David Jones, D.V.M.
The Cat Clinic of Louisville
P.O. Box 4963
Louisville, Ky 40204
Phone 502-451-2673 for location

Massachusetts

Tufts University School of Veterinary Medicine
Grafton
Telephone: (508) 839-7966

Michigan

Pet Loss Support Hotline
College of Veterinary Medicine
Michigan State University, Suite G100
East Lansing 48824
Telephone: 1-517-432-2696
Hotline operates Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday evenings from 6:30 to 9:30 P.M., Eastern time. During the summer, on Tuesday and Thursday only.

Minnesota

University of Minnesota School of Veterinary Medicine
Minneapolis
Telephone: (612) 625-1919The Broken Bond Pet Loss Hot Line/Support Group
Rochester
Telephone: (507) 289-8169

New Jersey

Pet Friends, Inc.
Moorestown
Telephone: (800) 404-7387St. Hubert’s Giralda
Madison
Telephone: (973) 377-7094

New York

Capitol Region Pet Loss Network
Albany
Telephone: (518) 448-5677 Animal Medical Center
New York
Telephone: (212) 838-8100 ASPCA
New York
Telephone: (212) 876-7700 Bide-A-Wee Foundation
New York
Telephone: (212) 532-6395

Cornell University
Ithaca
Telephone: (607) 253-3932

The Animal Medical Center
510 East 62nd Street, Manhattan
Human Resources Office
New York City
Phone 212-838-8100

Barbara Myers
29 Lyman Ave
Staten Island, NY 10305
718-720-5548
Certified Grief Therapist
First Consultation is available without cost.

Ohio
Ohio State University
Columbus
Telephone: (614) 292-1823

Oregon

Dove Lewis Emergency Animal Hospital Pet Loss Support Services.
Providing free pet loss support groups in the Portland, Oregon area since 1986.
Telephone: (503) 234-2061.
Email: etjournl@teleport.com
Visit their website at www.dovelewis.org

Pennsylvania

Healing Works: Specialized counseling for grief and loss, pet therapy available.
1644 W. Walnut Street, rear
Allentown, PA 18102
Telephone: 610-432-2168University of Pennsylvania School of Veterinary Medicine
Philadelphia
Telephone: (215) 898-4525

Utah

Elaine Winter, LCSW
1414 E 4500 S Suite 4
Salt Lake City, UT 84117
Telepone: 801-272-9555
Licensed Clinical Social Worker who specializes in Pet Bereavement Counseling

Virginia

Virginia-Maryland College of Veterinary Medicine
Blacksburgh
Telephone: (540) 231-8038

Washington

Washington State University, College of Veterinary Medicine, Pet Loss Hotline
Pullman, Washington
Telephone: (509) 335-5704
E-mail: plhl@vetmed.wsu.edu
Web: www.vetmed.wsu.edu/plhl

Wisconsin

The Rainbow Passage, Pet Loss Support and Bereavement Center
Grafton, WI
Telephone: (414) 376-0340
E-mail: douglasc@execpc.comPet Urns:

AMG Custom Urns
Here at AMG Custom Urns we want to help those animals by having a easier life with us by giving them a place to live, food, vets, toys and everything until there last breath, that means there cremation, urns, casket, services all that for pet lovers and other charity’s, from our personal account, every urns bought from us 2.50$ will also go to a charity in need. when you by a urn from us you choose the charity of your choice, this way everybody will be part of this, please visit our web site at http://woodurn.webs.com for size and price or even if you have more question right us at g_lacroix1@hotmail.com Hope to hear from you soon, from all those animals and from us, thank you!
Gaby Lacroix (Owner)

NOTE: we are not responsible for the content, claims, views, or representation on the listed sites and resources.

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Grief  and Pet Loss Quotes

There is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. -Winnie the Pooh

To spare oneself from grief at all cost can be achieved only at the price of total detachment, which excludes the ability to experience happiness.-Erich Fromm

The grief within me has its own heartbeat. It has its own life, its own song. Part of me wants to resist the rhythms of my grief, yet as I surrender to the song, I learn to listen deep within myself” -Alan Wolfelt

If you’re going through hell, keep going. -Winston Churchill

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do. –Eleanor Roosevelt

Tears are words that need to be written -Paulo Coelho

There’s a bit of magic in everything, and some loss to even things out.  -Lou Reed, “Magic and Loss”

In the night of death, hope sees a star, and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing.  -Robert Ingersoll

There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart. -Gandhi

Every evening I turn my worries over to God.  He’s going to be up all night anyway.  -Mary C. Crowley

Courage is being afraid but going on anyhow. -Dan Rather

The pain passes, but the beauty remains. -Pierre Auguste Renoir

When your fear touches someone’s pain, it becomes pity, when your love touches someone’s pain, it become compassion. 
-Stephen Levine

What we have enjoyed, we can never lose…all that we love deeply becomes a part of us.-Helen Keller

If I can see pain in your eyes then share with me your tears. If I can see joy in your eyes then share with me your smile. – Santosh Kalwar

Every day my love for you grows higher, deeper, wider, stronger. It grows and grows until it touches the tip of where you are and comes back to me in the loving memory of you, and my heart melts with that love and grows even more. -Maureen Hunter

She was no longer wresting with the grief, but could sit down with it as a lasting companion and make it a sharer in her thoughts. – George Eliot

Although it’s difficult today to see beyond the sorrow, may looking back in memory help comfort you tomorrow.
-Anonymous

One cannot get through life without pain…What we can do is choose how to use the pain life presents to us. – Bernie S. Siegel

Grieving is a journey that teaches us how to love in a new way now that our loved one is no longer with us. Consciously remembering those who have died is the key that opens the hearts, that allows us to love them in new ways. -Tom Attig

Don’t cry because it’s over, Smile because it happened.
- (Ted Geisel) Dr. Seuss

We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. -Kenji Miyazawa (1896-1933)

Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love. The only cure for grief is to grieve. -Earl Grollman

You are not enclosed within your bodies, nor confined to houses or fields. That which is you dwells above the mountain and roves with the wind…-Kahlil Gibran

All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle. –Saint Francis of Assisi

Even hundredfold grief is divisible by love. -Terri Guillemets

Death ends a life, not a relationship. -Jack Lemmon

Find the place inside where they is joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.-Joseph Campbell

Friendship is a single soul in two bodies. -Aristotle

There is no grief like the grief that does not speak. -Henry Wordsworth

Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget about it. -Jacques Prévert

There are three needs of the griever: To find the words for the loss, to say the words aloud and to know that they words have been heard. -Victoria Alexander ‘

Like a bird singing in the rain, let grateful memories survive the time of sorrow. –Robert Louis Stevenson

One joy scatters a hundred griefs. -Chinese Proverb

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes around in another form.-Rumi

You dance inside my chest where no-one sees you, but sometimes I do, and that sight becomes this art. Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened. There is a sacredness in tears. The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude – Thornton Wilder

 

Let me come in where you are weeping, friend and let me take your hand. I who have known a sorrow such as yours, can understand. -Grace Noll Crowell

Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime and falling in at night. –Edna St. Vincent Millay.

To live gratitude is to touch heaven. –Johannes Gaertner

The deepest feeling always shows itself in silence. –Marianne Moore

Friendship doubles our joy and divides our grief. –Swedish proverb

The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude. –Thorton Wilder

There is no death. Only a change of worlds.
- Chief Seattle

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.  -Kahlil Gibran

What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. 
All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.
-Helen Keller

All that is worth cherishing in this world begins in the heart not the head. –Anonymous

Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same. -Anonymous

When your eyes freeze behind the grey window and the ghost of loss gets in to you, may a flock of colours, indigo, red, green and azure blue come to awaken in you a meadow of delight. -John O’Donohue

The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief. But the pain of grief is only a shadow when compared with the pain of never risking love.” –Hilary Stanton Zunin

What one carries deep in his heart cannot be lost by death. -Goethe

Only people who are capable of loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow, but this same necessity of loving serves to counteract their grief and heals them. – Tolstoy

Grief is like the ocean; it comes in waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim. -Vicki Harrison

Until one has loved an animal,
 a part of one’s soul remains unawakened.
-Anatole France

My little dog – a heartbeat at my feet. -Edith Wharton

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
-Roger Caras

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